Hello Japan! Hello Kitty!

Despite its stereotypical childish appearance and colorful design, this book is actually an extremely useful and entertaining  introduction to Japanese society and culture, almost worth introducing to 1^st year University students studying Japanese culture. According to the book’s editor, it was initially designed to be used, and read by Japanese people who travel abroad, so that they can practice easy conversation with foreigners and discuss Japan, its culture and society. That’s why you can find the book at Haneda Airport and Chitose Airport’s book shops in Hokkaido (Not at Narita). The striking thing about this book is that it features the world wide famous Japanese Sanrio character Hello Kitty, also known as Kitty White*, who introduces the reader to her family, to her friends and all the special events and particularities of her home country. Throughout the book, Hello Kitty speaks systematically in English and in Japanese, which also helps to sharpen the language skills of a non-Japanese reader, who hopefully has a small amount of knowledge about Japan and its language. Because you can constantly compare the words in Japanese characters and in English, the reader’s eye is continuously learning and registering from the reading. The second striking thing about this book, apart from the fact that it features Hello Kitty, is also the use of the romaji reading, to make it easier for the non-Japanese conversation partner to read the book too!

The book is divided into six parts and in each of these parts, Hello Kitty introduces 9 to 13 chapters for each topic such as:

1)   “Welcome to Japan”

2)   “Communication”

3)   “Sightseeing”

4)   “History and Culture”

5)   “Food and Cooking”

6)   “Japanese Lifestyle”

The illustrations are simple as Kitty, and very straightforward. While introducing actual places in Japan or Japanese typical meals, the book uses actual photos to make it more real. But it also illustrates using symbols for the most famous object or place on a map of Japan, so as to put a “face” to the city or the prefecture. For example, Niigata city is famous for its rice fields and sake.  Aomori prefecture is famous for its delicious apples. Apparently, Yamaguchi city is famous for its poisonous fugu fish and Nagasaki city for its castella cake. Fukushima is spelled “Hukushima” and it features a samurai warrior—not three melted down nuclear reactors.

In every chapter, you can find a “Did you know?” section, which explains something awkward or something unusual about Japanese life.

Under the chapter “Attending a funeral” Osoushiki (お葬式), you learn all the details and the steps you need to take when you attend a Buddhist funeral in Japan.

Kitty-sama feels your pain. Let her guide you through the tribulations of a Japanese funeral.

The opening illustration where Hello Kitty sheds a single tear is wonderfully Japanese in many senses. If Hello Kitty was introducing Korean culture or American Reality TV, she’d be shooting tears from her eyes like North Korea testing missiles after the death of the Supreme Leader. The funeral section is surprisingly concise and thorough. It covers everything from the protocol for burning incense to honor the dead to making a bow to the family members, and receiving the “return gift” after the sad feast. The “Did you know” for this section tells you: “that when you see a hearse on the street, we make a fist putting the thumb inside. This is to protect our parents, as thumb is referred to as “parents finger”, (oyayubi 親指) in Japanese.

From time to time, you also find a section called “for young people only” (wakamono dake若者だけ) where you can learn the slang used by Japan’s younger and ruder generations, such as “Are you serious?” マジで？ Maji-de? Or “You must be joking” うっそ〜 ussoo.

The book has some practical uses as well. Under the chapter “National Holidays”, you can find a calendar with Japan’s special days, such as the “Respect of the Aged Day” 敬老の日keiroo no hi, which is the third Monday of September, every year.

Just in time for 節分 (Setsubun)! Coming up in February!

This book is not childish at all, read it and you will learn much about Japan and its people, children, youth, adults and elderly people. And there are absolutely no pictures of green tea KitKats or high-tech toilets. We expected this book to be awful—it turns out to be awfully entertaining.

Hello Kitty’s Guide to Japan, English and Japanese/ハローティの英語で紹介する

Editor:　ナツメ社/Natsume Edition

Author:　桑原功次/Koji Kuwabara

Year of Publication: 2011

*According to some sources, although Hello Kitty aka Kitty White is a Japanese company created character, she is actually a British female national. Which is a bloody surprise, don’t you think, guv’nor?

This door to the shrine is seldom used but worth walking through. On the other side, the land of the gods.

The first visit to a shrine at the start of the New Year is important in Japan. We went and filled out a votive tablet (絵馬) for you. Good luck and best wishes in 2012!

This is our way of saying thanks for sticking with us and the blog for 2011 and expressing our best wishes for 2012. Even if you don’t believe in the Shinto Gods, it can’t hurt to have them on your side.

あけましておめでとうございます！

Ms. Stucky Post Power-Spot. "I feel like I'm floating on air!"

Jake feels the power.

The Kiyomasa Well (清正井), located in the Meij Jingu (明治神宮) Inner Garden is believed to be one of Tokyo premier power spots. No one is sure when the rumors began but around 2010, Japanese celebrities began whispering that if you took a photo of the well and used it as your cell-phone mainscreen that your good luck would bubble over, like the pure water that continues to bubble from the Kiyomasa well for many decades. We know that not everyone can make it to “the pond of power” so we decided to go for you guys. We’re so glad we did.

The well of Kiyomasa. It brings great luck to all those who visit it and carry a photo of it in their cell-phone. Please use it as you please. (Japan Subculture Research Center 2012)

It’s easy to miss the magic well of Kiyomasa, since the Meiji Jingu Inner Garden is a little off the beaten path to the main shrine. According to Meiji Shrine, the garden first belonged to Lord  Kiyomasa Kato and later Lord Li during the Edo Period. (When was the Edo period? Look it up. ) In the reign of Emperor Meiji, who was quite the radical reformer in his day, it was passed over to the Imperial Estate.

The well is fountain head of Nan-Chi (South pond) and the pure water bubbles out in a steady flow all year round. Apparently, it was a lucky strike when Lord Kato started to dig a basement. The well is famous for its simplistic design and the excellence of the well-water. Unfortunately, since the triple-meltdown in March, the shrine now asks people to refrain from drinking the water. However, photos are still okay!  You can even dip your hands into the relatively warm water. Swimming: not allowed. Enjoy the luck while it lasts!

The well is still so popular that lines form to take a picture of it.

Assistant editor and staff writer Nathalie-Kyoko Stucky tests out the power of the well. "冷たい！”

“Kiyoku, tadashiku, utsukushiku” 　『清く、正しく、美しく』 “We shall perform with Purity, Sincerity and Beauty”

Introduction:

Takarazuka Revue, is the 20^th century version of Japanese Kabuki, the primary differences being it incorporates Western music and instead of all men playing both female and male roles, all the performers are all women. In Takarazuka, which has a cult like-following in Japan, the most esteemed role of all is that of the 男役 (otoko-yaku) : the part of the male.

The cultural ramifications and sexual dynamic of this entertainment empire are extremely well-covered in the book  Takarazuka: Sexual Politics and Popular Culture in Modern Japan by Jennifer Robertson.

Women perform all the male and female characters of the company’s musicals and shows; all the members of the troupe refer to themselves internally as “students.”  Male role performers are granted a higher status in the company. About 400 members represent the whole company. Forty new members directly recruited by the Takarazuka music academy enter the professional troupe each year. Top stars usually spend 6 to 10 years as junior students.

Once she enters the company, the student will belong to one of the five kumi, (factions), such as the Hana Gumi (Flower Troupe), Tsuki Gumi (Moon Troupe), Yuki Gumi (Snow Troupe), Sora Gumi (Sky Troupe), Hoshi Gumi (Star Troupe). The word “kumi” or “gumi” in Japanese is also often used by Japanese criminal organizations in faction names but there is no Goto-gumi in the Takarazuka. Each troupe has a leader, and this position is acceded to members according to strict seniority. There are more than 70 members in each troupe. In every troupe, there is a designated top star in the male role and in the female role, both together they are the goruden conbi, ゴールデンコンビ, (golden combination). Women who reached this position have reached the highest pinnacle of success for a Takarazuka star.

The Takarazuka Opera Company performs in two main theaters: one in Takarazuka City, Hyogo Prefecture and a theater in Hibiya, Tokyo, (Subway A13).

 History:

Ichizo Kobayashi is the founder of this cultural institution and its origins date back to 1910. This businessman, who owned the Hankyu Railways in Osaka decided to build the first indoor swimming pool in Japan in the village of Takarazuka near Osaka, in order to attract clients who would have to use the rail ways to get to that area. Having created a non-heated mixed swimming pool, this entertainment place called paradaisu (“Paradise”) did not get the success he was expecting. However, in 1911, in Osaka, the the department store Mitsukoshi engaged a group of ten male singers and musicians in the western style in order to entertain the clients of the department store and it was a rousing success. Kobayashi immediately decided to rip off the idea, recruited about twenty girls, and taught them to sing. He transformed the indoor swimming pool into a gigantic theater, whose purpose was to entertain families and children. In the beginning, the girls were part of a singing choir, Takarazuka shoukaitai( 宝塚唱歌隊,aka the choir of Takarazuka), however Kobayashi insisted on adding the word shoujo, 少女 (young woman) to the name that he gave to his group in the naming of Takarazuka shoujo kageki yousei kai (宝塚少女歌劇養成会-the association of opera training young girls).

In 1913, Kobayashi’s institution was named Takarazuka Kageki Dan (宝塚歌劇団) (The Takarazuka Academy of Music). Kobayashi then founded a school of music and dancing. Young women who were recruited had to spend two years in the Academy before joining the Takarajiennu, タカラジエンヌ, (“Takarasiennes”) from the professional troupe. This is how a new bourgeois type of culture was created that was aimed at people who could afford to spend money for pleasure and fun.

What type of performance:

The production of Takarazuka includes also Japanese traditional type of plays, such as the Genji Monogatari (源氏物語–Tales of Genji), European style of plays, such as “Mon Paris”, and also Broadway style shows, such as West Side Story. The shows at Takarazuka were, in the beginning essentially addressed to an audience of children, however the style soon became erotic and politically engaged. In general, the theater never represented contemporary Japan, except during the 1930’s and 1940’s, when certain military subjects were treated. Japanese people or society were almost never represented. The show offered the Japanese people a chance to  dream of lives in other parts of the world.

Sexual Politics:

The actresses of Takarazuka are recruited according to esthetic and physical criteria, such as their beauty, their height (taller than average for otokoyaku, 男役, (male performers), their voice and the shape of their face (square face, if possible, for the otokoyaku). Just by naming these criteria, we can see that clichés for male roles are established from the start.

During the first years of Takarazuka, in the 1910’s, the joyuu, 女優, (actresses, female comedians) were not viewed favorably by the public. They were judged as being decadent and leading a life of independent women. To which, Kobayashi has responded by creating an academy for young women who attend “school” as seito, 生徒, (students). This made it sound like the girls were not professional performers. This understanding also assured the parents that they had placed their child in a good school, where education was very strict and traditional. “Takarasiennes” was a name to refer to the term in vogue parijiennu, パリジエンヌ, (“Parisiennes”) or parisians. The Takarasiennes are hierarchized within the academy of music and dance. They have to study during two years and hold a relationship of sempai/kouhai, 先輩/後輩, (elder/smaller sisters) between the first year and second year students. This means that the kouhai have to respect the senpai and they have to clean the music and dancing rooms without electrical equipment such as vacuum cleaners. The teachers at Takarazuka are convinced that intense work and hardship education shapes the characters of the students. Men are also strictly prohibited from coming inside the academy. Takarazuka allowed young Japanese women to participate to artistic culture and more precisely allowed women work as artists in contemporary theatrical culture. There were very few actresses and singers during the early days of Takarzuka but the quasi-academic setting protected the image of its performers and reassured society that these women were engaged in a legitimate enterprise.

When Kobayashi started his musical company, he did not want the public to imagine that the Takarasiennes were delinquents. He played with the terms of designation to preserve the “purity and innocence” of his dancers. He has defined the brand image of his product: he made clear that his recruits come from wealthy families and that after they spent years within Takarazuka, his actresses were “ready” to become virtuous women, knowing how to take care of men and how to educate correctly their children. He therefore followed the myth of the “good wife/wise mother”, according to the term used by Jennifer Robertson, in Takarazuka: Sexual Politics and Popular Culture in Modern Japan (1998). This concept seems to have been invented during the Meiji period in order to catalyze society. Kobayashi even pretended that the young woman who graduated from his academy were going to be more disciplined and suited for family life because his school guided them in a healthy path and without direct relationship with men from the outside.

Takarazuka, at its start, present some characteristic of paternalism. Young Japanese women were trained to become model housewives. It seems that Kobayashi even tried to control his girls even after they retired, by ensuring a decent marriage with a respectable and rich man. This shows, once again, the importance of “economic” marriage for women (in Japan) and in general.

Language in Theater:

In the Japanese language, the speech of each gender is much more distinct than in most of other languages. For example, in French or in English, there is not more than one way to refer to oneself, as a person with male genitals or female genitals. When we refer to ourselves, we say “I”. In Japanese, at oral speech, females and males use the pronoun watashi or watakushi, 私, in order to designate themselves. However, females usually do not use or cannot use (although nowadays, anything is possible!) the pronouns ore, 俺, or boku, 僕, these terms are used by males.

Media controversy in the 1930’s:

In 1939, when the media turned against Takarazuka for the first time, the actresses, especially the otokoyaku actresses performing male figures were seriously been discredited. One of the first scandals of lesbianism had been denounced in the press at that moment. Effectively, these women disguised as men and imitating male voice and speech, with short hair were beginning to worry the public opinion. What actually worried the Japanese society was more the sudden love of the young Japanese women for the western culture and these otokoyaku.

The Fans:

Many of the fans seems to have been mature or married women, but what was unacceptable for the Japanese society in general were the pubescent and pre-pubescent shoujo, 少女, whose sexuality was beginning to be “deviant” or “deviating” by the Takazuka actresses. Official measures have been taken to put these young girls on the “right path” and to direct them into their femininity so that they could enter the symbolic adulthood described by the Restoration. The modern Japanese woman, as Robertson describes her to us readers in her book, was “fascinating, attractive, weak and different”, that is why it was desirable for men to control her. However, this soon began to be a necessity, because the woman was beginning to be “dangerous, strong and indifferent”. The Japanese state showed a strong will to describe the ideal shojo and a strong will to operate to contribute to form patriarchal military institutions, which idealized heterosexuality.

Kobayashi, the founder of Takarazuka was not a feminist, however he seemed to openly criticize society centered on masculinity. He was the first to wish that theater and opera were accessible to women as much as to men. Kobayashi seems to have used his Takarazuka actresses to circulate the ideal image of male and female behavior within the family cell. While bowing to the sexual politics of the times, he also seemed to subvert the culture and allow women greater access to the world of the performing arts. However, as the times have changed, Takarazuka has not. It will be interesting to see how or if it survives into the next century.

According to the organizers of the conference, over 100 people from 20 countries and more than 200 Japanese NGO participated to the Global Conference for Nuclear Power Free World in Yokohama between January 14 and 15^th 2011, ten months after the big Fukushima power plant accident. As of Saturday 14^th, there had been 16’600 live online viewers and over 6’427 tickets had been sold. On Saturday, over 3000 people visited the conference in Yokohama, according to organizers. The final tally will be on Monday. The conference conveyed people from different countries in the world who have experienced nuclear disasters, such as hibakusha (people who have been exposed to large amounts of nuclear radiation) or nuclear waste land residents and people who were irradiated during nuclear weapons tests. Their message was the same: “Call on your governments to shut down the  nuclear power plants and uranium mines in the world.” Ten months after the meltdown of three reactors at the Fukushima nuclear power plant, many people still have a feeling that the truth has not been told and that not enough has been done. “Only a global network of experts can be sufficient to support the victims of the Fukushima accident. The world has experienced Chernobyl and now Fukushima, we have to network, share information and learn from previous mistakes”, said the chairman of the Nuclear Free World Organizing Committee, Tatsuya Yoshioka. Many people from Tohoku committed suicide after they realized their land was forever tainted. One man in the last message on he posted on his desk before he died, wrote:  “If there were no nuclear power plants, if there were no nuclear power, this would not have happened”.

At the opening remarks of the conference, Japanese anti-nuclear “rebels” such as Eisaku Sato, former governor of Fukushima Prefecture gave a speech.

Eisaku Sato became governor of Fukushima Prefecture in 1988 after being elected at the Upper House in 1983. He came into disagreement with the Japanese government on nuclear power plant issues and the excess concentration of population and industry in the Tokyo Metropolitan area. He was forced to step down in 2006 and later prosecuted for corruption related to a dam construction project. Despite being found guilty, he denies all these charges and is now appealing to the Supreme Court. He has claimed that he was framed by TEPCO and their allies in the Japanese government because he raised issues about TEPCO’s lax safety practice. The courts determined that he actually received 0 yen in profits on the supposed construction fraud.  One of the prosecutors in his case was later convicted for forging evidence in another criminal investigation. He said that, from his personal experience, the municipal government headquarters of Fukushima only notified the Fukushima people of the meltdown six days after then national news began to report on it. Many local communities in Japan rely heavily on the nuclear industry to provide jobs.  When the city of Iwaki, in the Ibaragi prefecture went bankrupt, it was not only the famous “Hula Girls” who lifted up the local economy. They also agreed to let nuclear waste be stored there. In 2001, the Ministry of Finance was split in two, and the Ministry of Industry and Trade became unified the same year.  “To promote business and industry under the same agency is just like having the police and the thieves working under the same umbrella”, Eisaku Sato said.

Mrs. Rebecca Harms, Member of the European Parliament and vice president of the Greens/EFA group, from Germany, addressed the Japanese public at the opening ceremony of the Global Conference for Nuclear Power Free World, in Yokohama. She said her country has closed eight power plants after the Fukushima accident, although Germany is currently under conservative leadership. She said that the Fukushima limited evacuation decision is “not comprehensible after the lessons learnt at Chernobyl”.   Mr. Tetsunori Ida, Director of the Institute for Sustainable Energy Policy, in Japan, said that after the Three Mile Island, the Chernobyl accidents, and last year the Fukushima accident, nuclear energy was a questionable resource. He noted Japan has been shaken by the third nuclear catastrophe in its own history–Hiroshima and the Nagasaki were the first. “Japan is going through a third change in its history, after the revolution at the Meiji Period, after the Second World War and now after the Fukushima nuclear accident, we can say this: The Fukushima accident has created a Jasmine Revolution in Japan, generating public outcry and debate.”

Peter Watts, an aborigine and co-chair of The Australian Nuclear Free Alliance, said that the British government detonated a nuclear weapon on his neighboring lands in Australia in the 1950’s. Australia has four uranium mines, which is one third of the world’s total. Australia sells uranium to 15 countries, to the US, UK, France, Japan, South Korea, China, Spain, Taiwan, Sweden, Germany, Belgium, Finland, Germany, Canada and South Africa. “TEPCO has bought Australian uranium, and the particles that were spread over Japan come from Australia. We must stop uranium mining”.

Shuntaro Hida, a Japanese medical doctor and Hiroshima atomic bomb survivor has been practicing his profession until March 2011. At the age of 94, he decided to retire after 3/11 and devote his time to giving advice the Fukushima mothers and victims. Having been a medical doctor during the US occupation, he knows that the US government did not disclose information about the effects of radioactivity and therefore some information is not well known in Japan. However, Mr. Hida has been networking with the NGO called “The Bridge to Chernobyl” and its president Mrs. Noro. Together they agree that many medical symptoms that have appeared in Chernobyl children also appeared in children of Fukushima and also the Kanto area, such as nose bleeding, joints, and pain in the bones etc. However, medical doctors cannot prove that these symptoms are related to radiation, and therefore will never admit publicly that there is any link with the Fukushima meltdown. According to his experience, observing the hibakusha from the Hiroshima atomic bomb, Mr. Hida says the symptoms appear after 6 months to one year. Ever since he retired from being a medical doctor in March 2011, he has been appointed to more than 84 conferences to inform Japanese people about the effects of radiation.   When asked if the Japanese government should keep the corpses of the animals that lived in the Forbidden 20km zone, Mr. Hida said: “The government should pay scientists from universities to research and study the corpses and the living beings and animals from the 20 km zone, even if it takes 10 or 20 years to conduct those efforts. These animals should not be destroyed or forgotten forever”.

Shuntaro Hida is currently 95 years and 15 days old, and is still in a good shape although he was a victim of the Hiroshima bomb, and he advises people to practice activities to stay healthy and longevity: “go to bed early (hayane), wake up early (hayaoki), get a good sleep (suimin), eat well, go to the toilet (eat a lot of fiber so that you poop regularly), play a lot, work a lot and practice good sex. Only a world without nuclear power can be a better world.”   Miss Kathleen Reiley, (67) a visitor at the conference, has lived 43 years in Japan, and has been working as a volunteer councilor at the National Cancer Center Hospital in Tokyo. She said that after the Tokaimura accident in Ibaraki prefecture in 1999, she observed that she has been meeting more children with solid tumors, 3 to 4 years after the nuclear accident. She also said that the Tokaimura has the most plutonium of any of the reactors, and plutonium attacks the bones. “I have asked the authorities for investigation to understand if there is a link between the children who get bone cancer or leukemia and the place where they live, but no one replied to my demand. I heard a boy from Fukushima today say that he felt, ‘our lives and health are more important than money, I do not want to get sick”.

It is not clear that the Government of Japan feels the same way.

FUCKIN' SALE. In flashy Osaka the use of English for decorative purposes in Japanese advertising reaches a new peak of perfection.

There are some stories that explain themselves pretty f*ckin’ eloquently.

God knows what the people in this Department Store in Osaka were thinking when they came up with this advertising slogan but Zarina Yamaguchi, a friend of a friend, was thinking “pretty damn funny” when she snapped this picture on January 4th. Zarina explains:

Well, a childhood friend of mine and I were strolling along the local street in Shinsaibashi, Osaka. Being around the extra-genki Osaka-jins and salesladies screaming ‘Irashaimasse’ from every direction for the ongoing New Year Sales has never made us feel more at home. On our way to catch up over coffee, I walked into this store to check some things. Truth is, I didn’t even notice the posters. When I looked around, each corner had posters that printed ‘fucking sale’. I didn’t know how to react but what caught me by surprise was that none of the people around me seem to understand the profanity. My friend Sarah and I, both of mixed Japanese descent, both bilingual in Japanese and English, were struck with the comical twist. Pretty sure I would have never seen this elsewhere, I had to snap a shot. 

The store is located in Shinsaibashi right next to Hearton Hotel Shinsaibashi and Planet 3rd cafe, she adds.

I should note that Zarina’s childhood friend is Sarah Kashani, my friend and one of the most knowledgable scholars on Koreans in Japan. Sarah verified the authenticity of the signage and the sale, although neither side has disclosed whether they actually bought anything at the sale.

2012 is going to be a fuckin’ awesome year in Japan. You can’t help but feel that way. Our thanks to Ms. Yamaguchi-sama for her contribution. We’re f*ckin’ grateful. 超感謝ですよ。

These cats are all dressed up for the fuckin' sale, dude.

What 2011 means for Japan in 2012 and beyond

I have a jaded opinion of what Japan needs to do in the future is as follow after this, but I’d like to know what you think Japan needs to do this year as a nation to improve itself.  Suggestions welcome.  Here is my take:  Japan needs government agencies with the autonomy to do their jobs, where whistle-blowing is rewarded and a free and independent press to serve as a fail-safe device when the watchdogs fall asleep on the job.

Japan’s biggest problems are not disaster readiness or dealing with the nuclear meltdowns. The biggest problems Japan faces are encapsulated in Tepco and Olympus: systematic corruption, lack of real regulation, and lack of oversight by independent bodies on the companies that have so much influence on the nation. The nuclear disaster at Fukushima was foreseen and nothing was done; mounting evidence suggests that the earthquakes alone caused enough damage to one reactor to start a meltdown. The Nuclear and Industry Safety Agency, instead of sanctioning Tepco, has been a cheerleader. The financial fraud at Olympus should have been uncovered years ago. Corruption is a cancer that eats at Japan and for the country to grow, those cells need to be removed.

I celebrated the 1st of the year with family back in the USA.  I moved three containers of stuff out of my old home. It made me think a little about the new year and the past. Not that the past is ever really over, it just fades into the background, but haunts our lives like a ghost or a very surly poltergeist.  I know what my resolutions are for the year but going back over all old blog entries I realize what I wish for 2012.

These aren’t my words but I wish I had the power to make these benedictions come true. Have a good year! (From tomorrow we will return to our usual caustic and black humor.)

無縁地蔵尊-Bodhisattva Muen-Jizo, Patron Buddha of The Forgotten and Unmourned

 May those who go in dread

have no more fear.

May captives be unchained and now set free

And may the weak now receive their strength

May beings help each other in kindness

May the lonely no longer be alone

May travelers upon the road

Find happiness no matter where they go

And may they gain, without the need of toil,

The goals on which they set their hearts

--benediction from Shantideva, Buddhist scholar

During the last Year Of The Dragon (2000), Godzilla caused almost as much damage to Japan as TEPCO. Happily, recent earthquakes did not awaken him.

A solid earthquake with a magnitude of 7.0 shook up a wide area in eastern and northeastern Japan on  Sunday, the Japan Meteorological Agency said. There was no Godzilla Warning issued and no Nuclear Safety Inspection Agency staff hurt themselves fleeing from the nuclear reactors where they were stationed.

The Government of Japan has assured the populace that Godzilla did not waken from his slumber to herald in the Year Of The Dragon. Prime Minister Noda assured the public that Godzilla was not in fact a dragon, while admitting that because Godzilla is a fire-breathing, gigantic, destructive reptile–”he does bare similarities to a dragon but Godzilla cannot fly. Thus he’s not a dragon. We have everything under control this time.” The Godzilla & Mothra Management Agency (GMMA) also said that they had checked the ear plugs inserted in Godzilla’s head and were certain that the ruckus had not caused any serious changes in his REM measurements. “He’s sound asleep,” sources said.

The agency noted that quake measured an intensity of 4 on the Japanese scale of 7 in many locations in downtown Tokyo, Miyagi, Fukushima, Ibaraki, Tochigi, Gunma, Chiba, Saitama and Kanagawa prefectures–but only 1.2 in the underwater dungeon in which Godzilla has been imprisoned since the previous Year Of the Dragon.

Happy New Year 2012

It was a hell of a year. Literally, for the last surviving editor of this blog, at least. 2011 was the year that an earthquake devastated Japan, followed by a triple nuclear meltdown courtesy of the corrupt and possibly criminally negligent folks at TEPCO. Tadamasa Goto, the former yakuza boss allegedly turned Buddhist priest, was “lucky” enough to have one of his former henchmen shot to death in Thailand, thus basically destroying a five year investigation into him on murder charges. He united with the Kyushu Seido-kai and began working as a gangster again, prompting the police to reunite a “Goto Squad” and making me very uncomfortable.

Olympus, the optical equipment maker brought into focus the extent of corruption and lack of governance in Japan’s corporate world. Stephanie Nakajima, our chief editor took off to Occupy New York. Sarah Noorbaksh continued to be our tech support but began to focus on new projects.

On a personal level, I discovered that no natural disaster seems to trump the natural disaster that is my own body. Years of drinking and smoking too much probably took their toll and I came back to Japan after 3/11 to find a note from the doctor that no patient wants to read. I survived illness #1 only to get knocked down again with illness #2.  I got better. I got smarter. On October 1st, the same day the organized exclusionary clauses went on the books nation-wide, I quit smoking. Except for one binge, I’ve stayed nicotine free. I’m not expecting a pat on the back. As my daughter says, “Not smoking is no big deal. Do we congratulate people for not slamming their fingers in a door for six months or say ‘Hey, congratulations, it’s been two weeks since you walked into a wall!’”  She has a point.

This year we have a new staff, a bigger budget, and hopefully some guest contributors.  Look forward to more articles, more entries and more photos as well. Before burying 2011, I’d like to say a special thanks to Stephanie Nakajima, Sarah Noorbakhsh, Ikuru Kuwajima, Mari Kurisato, and everyone who wrote into this blog and has continued to read it. It is appreciated and hopefully edifying for you as well. If not edifying, at least entertaining. And if neither, hopefully a pleasant waste of time.

May 2012 bring you good fortune, happiness, health and contentment. May the wicked be punished, the just rewarded, TEPCO dismantled, Japan revitalized,  the corrupt imprisoned and may the 99% learn to share a little bit better with the 1%, may I be free from mild dyslexia and may the 1% share a little bet better with the 99%. 合掌！

Wishing you all the best for 2012!

My personal favorite buzzword of the year was 想定外 (soteigai) which literally means, “outside what we could conceive” or “unforeseeable.”   It was used often by Tokyo Electric Power Company (TEPCO) to explain their failure to prevent a triple nuclear meltdown. We hear the word less from the TEPCO flacks as it turns out that for years they were aware that a large earthquake could cause critical damage to the plant and a plant and that a tsunami might wipe out their electrical systems and back-up systems for dealing with damage to the nuclear reactors.  Perhaps, 想定外  in the TEPCO play books means this, “We don’t foresee anyone holding us accountable for our criminal negligence.” They may be right. I’m using it as my excuse for anything poorly planned, for example, when ordering Christmas gifts from Amazon the day before Christmas. “Gee kids, I don’t know why that Lego set didn’t arrive. 想定外ですね”

Gakuranman, has an encyclopedic feature on the 60 buzzwords for the year, including 超可愛い (super-cute) photos. Click on these happy (ageopoyo) girls for the feature. 

For the top ten buzzwords, Sandra Barron, of the Japan Times Japan Pulse, has a great article. Here’s an excerpt.

The news in Japan in 2011 was dominated by the March 11 earthquake and tsunami that devastated much of the Tohoku region (and proved the worth of Tokyo’s earthquake-resistant architecture). It’s only natural that words related to the disaster and its aftermath made up a good portion of the top buzzwords of the year as chosen by Jiyu Kokuminsha, publishers of an annual book of new and newly important words. However, the mundane and the downright silly mix with the serious in this list, whittled down from an initial 60 nominees, as life did go on for most of Japan, albeit with a new sense of gravity. In descending order, here are the top 10 buzz phrases of 2011 in Japan.